if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
