it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
