we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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