I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
time to smoke my breakfast
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize