omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
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