I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
