did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
