return my video game
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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