we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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