What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Randomize
