Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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