babies were throwing up all over the place
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling