love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
