never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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