Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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