Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize