Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
