But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
