you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
