Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
