What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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