Banned from zoo.
Again?
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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