My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
