why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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