We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
