Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
My vagina just recognized that song.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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