R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
So squirting runs in the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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