He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
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as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
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Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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