You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
We need to get me chipped asap
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
