Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does it feel to date your dad?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize