Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
