I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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