Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
