I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Randomize
