OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
