that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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