Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
