I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Randomize