My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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