return my video game
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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