i wish peter jackson would direct porn
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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