he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
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It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
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Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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