Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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