I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
The best revenge is premature balding
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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