I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
