oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
