i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
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