just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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