OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
