i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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